The Ballad of Bomberman - Act 2

Act 2: Timing is Everything

11:30 am, November 16,2010

Location- Dept. of Fuel and Mineral Engg.

After the heroics displayed by me on Monday, I was elated and elevated. Although what I did was not by societal standards a good deed, I still wanted to believe that I had in some way broken out of a cage.My firm belief that exams, or for that matter vivas,could not be cleared without decent preparation,had been shattered to bits. The fear before Material Handling exam had been replaced with a sense of pride and freedom. But I had decided that that was the first and the last time. No more of such irresponsible behaviour  from now onwards. Hah! What a joke!

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5 pm Monday evening, I was done with my first prac. The week had 3 more vivas on the menu. And the next one-Physical Separation, was going to be served with breakfast on Tuesday morning at 10 o'clock. While all the guys were discussing how 'Mandrake'(Phy. Separation prof.) would rape each and every student of Vth MLE, I was already on my way out of the campus. I needed some air. I mean all this panicky behaviour just turns me off. 

And 'Mandrake'? Come on! He is nothing! Well, his actual name is N.R Mandre. I christened him 'Mandrake' after the famous cartoon character. That is because our beloved professor has the very special quality of magically removing smiles from the faces of his students and replace them with creases of tension. He once caught me in class while I was busy examining a hair that had come off my scalp while I was removing my cap. I have been an eternal back bencher in his class.I didn't pay much attention to his scolding, because he's an a** anyway! But I do remember his comparing me to a donkey and moron and officially declaring that I would never be a good mineral engineer! Like I ever wanted to be one!

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9:30 pm Monday night

I had just come back to my room and as usual it had more occupants than the two beds in it could support. I gave the tress passers an I-want-to-sleep-get-the-f***-out-of-my room look and after 15 minutes I was in my dream world. It was something about me and my girlfriend and some regular college stuff thrown in. 

7:30 am Tuesday morning

I woke up with my best friend's good morning SMS. The morning was already doomed. I had Mandrake waiting to rape me, and I didn't even cared to buy some 'protection'! I hurriedly completed my unfinished practical notebook. That took about an hour. Brushing, bathing and breakfast took another half an hour. I spent the remaining 1 hour playing PacMan and Poker on my Manish's laptop. I had decided I would just ask questions from the guys going in before me. The easy way out, as always!

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Before I tell you how I fared in my viva, let me describe the scene and position of all the characters and elements in the room. On the other side of a huge antique table- Kalicharan, Mandrake, and their sidekick LK-our three nemesis. On this side of the table- Me,Baul the stupid,Nanga the alcoholic,Reja the topper ,Purwar the overconfident a** and  Manish the laptop guy!

6 on 3...sounds good,right? Well, me and Reja were the best prepared guys in the group, so now you can see the odds were not really in our favour.

Mandrake fired the first shot. He inquired from LK about our attendances in lab throughout the semester and Baul and Purwar came out to be defaulters. First blood!

Mandrake ordered us all to write down one practical each that we had performed in the lab.Nanga was the first one to finish. But hardly did he realize what a blunder he had just made. As soon as his pen stopped, Mandrake and Kalicharan directed their guns towards him. The started questioning him alternately and soon we bid farewell to Nanga. Three men down in the first 5 minutes!

Seeing Nange's fate, me,Reja and Manish slowed down our pens. We were buying time, because each group was being held captive for around 20 minutes. I had been thrown a relatively easy practical at me, one which I knew about. My finishing coincided with Kalicharan leaving the room on account of some urgent work. Great!3 on 2 now!

Mandrake asked me the basic principle of the experiment I had written down. Piece of cake. But before I could open my mouth, his cellphone interrupted(with the worst ringtone I have ever heard in my life)! Reja had engaged LK in a duel,Manish was still writing and I had a few minutes to spare.I was so excited at my good luck that I quietly took out my cellphone and messaged my best friend-"Viva going on.I am doing good! :)". She replied with a string of question marks. I decided not to reply. And it was a good decision because just as I slipped the phone back in my pocket, Mandrake returned.

I answered his question and after that he asked a tricky question related to diamagnetism and paramagnetism. Now this was his trump card- Divide and destroy! All six of us looked at each other, not sure what to do. Purwar,Baul and Manish stuck to one theory, Nanga kept quiet, Reja gave one of his own and I decided to stick to mine. And luckily for me, I turned out to be the correct one! That impressed Mandre,or maybe my wearing a shirt impressed him. Whatever, the impression did not last long, as he scolded us all for being the worst batch in the history of Mineral Engineering. It was a ritual every incoming group had to undergo before going out. But I knew I had done well!

PS- I still wonder,"What if I had decided to reply to my best friend and Mandrake would have caught me with a cellphone in my hand in the middle of a viva?"

Continued...